Jan 8, 2018
Are you starving yourself of oxygen?
Are you giving yourself enough of what you need?
Now everybody knows the safety drill on a plane, either delivered by a cheesy video or the flight attendants. The explicitly command that in the event of an accident you are to put on your own oxygen mask before helping others. I used to sit there thinking “Yeah sure, with my 7 year old daughter sat next to me I’ll put my own mask on first, f**k that!” Now the thing is that metaphor in itself is very valuable and useful in everyday life.
You’ve seen the movies, where there’s that one guy or girl running around in the face of disaster trying to help and save everyone. When even they themselves have only one arm or are in dire need of help. Now don’t get me wrong this is doable but it would be much easier if you were able to give and help everyone when you yourself is intact. However, you and I both know that this is actually a need, a feeling that we have to put ourselves second. This need, this feeling has been passed down through generations from our tribal days.
I’ll give you an example, it may seem extreme but just bear with me here. A friend of mine ran herself in to the ground trying to help someone. She spent a lot of time trying to help this homeless guy and burnt herself out with the amount of energy she invested in him but didn’t want to let him go. Because on some level she didn’t want to not be there for him the way her parents weren’t there for her. The problem was that she didn’t recognise the desperation for being there for someone else, the way no one else was there for her. As a result she was forced to give up in the end and couldn’t help him due to how drained and unkempt she was.
My invitation to you is to recognise the programs in you, where you desperately try to save and help others, ask yourself this:
A: What part of you are you trying to help or save?
B: When did you make the decision you had to be there for other people and you couldn’t be there for yourself?
I would love to hear your thoughts and how you feel about this. Comment, like and ask questions about the episode on iTunes. Jump in the Facebook Group Self Awareness with Duke and interact with the amazing souls we have in there.
Can’t wait to hear from you and see you in the next episode.
Have an awesome day.